.at my desk with some thoughts.

.do you know?.

2011-12-13T17:33:00.003Z

Sekuat mana kita setia
Sehebat mana kita merancang
Sejauh mana kita menunggu
Sekeras mana kita bersabar
Sejujur mana kita menerima
Jika ALLAH tidak menulis jodoh kita bersama
Kita tetap TIDAK akan bersama

credits to sweetparadox.tumblr.com

.my mother.

2011-10-24T13:05:00.001+01:00

I have come to realize, how I rely on my mother in so many things. She used to stay with me in Sheffield for about 7 weeks. In a cubicle studio. So technically we bumped into each other 24/7.

We sleep on the same bed, we pillow talk, we went for road trip, we go ga-ga doing the online shopping, we gobble our food over some Korean/English/Malay movies, we walk in the city and the park. We did almost everything together.

Now, my final year in Sheffield. I live with friends. I must say, happening. But, I miss her presence.

When I'm hungry, she'll let me eat. When I'm bored, she'll say do your work/let’s walk in the park/let’s go to the city/let’s online shop again! When I want to watch movies, she’ll just join without complaining about what movie we are going to watch. When exam is coming, she’ll accompany me in the night to study. When I have my work done, especially writing thesis/reports, she’ll proofread for me. When I got cut, she’ll nag consistently to put ubat. When I’m being clumsy and hit the cupboard/bed/desk, she actually hit those stuffs back as if they were being clumsy and hit me.

I can’t wait to see you and others. Insyaallah, soon.

To my mother, Ibu, I love you so much. You have been the most wonderful mother that a girl could ask for and I hope I have been wonderful to you too.

.cinta.

2011-08-15T16:03:00.002+01:00

Cinta adalah gurauan kehidupan
Kadang-kadang buat kita ketawa
Kadang-kadang buat kita terasa
Dan gurauan yang buat kita memahami macam-macam emosi.

Kalau yang mencantikkan lukisan adalah warna
Maka yang mencantikkan kehidupan adalah cinta.

.rambut sama hitam, hati lain-lain.

2011-07-11T05:29:00.002+01:00

If you are concern about your rakyat, why not be one of us and learn what we feel. Rather than having not even quarter of the rakyat to make fuss in the heart of KL.

And if I may ask, does the people you gather have the same intention to be called united? Because I saw children too. Shameful.

.oh hello.

2011-05-27T18:34:00.003+01:00

Hello all. I have totally abandoned my blog. For some reason. No. I forgot I have a blog. Smirk. Well, it's exam weeks. Just finished a paper and have another two to go.

Abah is here, visiting. He came down from Oslo and going back to Malaysia tomorrow which is Saturday. At least, I am no longer a home sick person. Lol. It's good to see him.

Anyway, I'm not feeling very well. Since early May. Had some problems with my health. Should have taken good care of myself rather than just doing the overload works.

BUT, despite the health issues and exams, managed to organize a trip to Italy, right after exam! London-Rome-Venice-Verona-Milan. Nice ay? Yeah then will head back to London to meet my beloved families and off we go to Brussels and Amsterdam. Hee so excited. Currently busy planning to get a US visa for next summer vacation, New York maybe. Planning to go Spain this coming winter. And any other time for German, Switzerland and Austria. Then I will think about going to the Eastern Europe. "Wahh spending money like you earn them," said Abah. What can I do, you give me money, I spend for travelling expenses. Better than to shop, right? At least I get to see the world. Grin.

Okay, going to watch Maharaja Lawak and rest. Talk to you soon okay. x

.out of topic.

2011-05-10T00:03:00.003+01:00

It ain't easy to love.
But when you have got one for yourself,
Learn how to keep it safe and sound in your heart.

Truthfully, I am pissed. Bye.

.russian roulette.

2011-04-21T12:47:00.001+01:00

And you can see my heart beating
You can see it through my chest
That I'm terrified
But I'm not leaving
I know that I must pass this test
So just pull the trigger.

.tahun itu.

2011-04-14T19:20:00.001+01:00

Tahun itu,
Tahun akan datang.
Tahun itu,
Tahun yang aku tunggu-tunggu.
Tahun itu,
Berakhirlah status aku sebagai pelajar.
Tahun itu juga,
Mungkin tahun aku menjejakkan kaki ke alam kerja.

Tahun itu,
Tanggungjawab pada diri sendiri bertambah.
Tahun itu,
Aku mula mencari duit untuk disimpan.
Tahun itu,
Mulalah aku mencari teman.
Tahun itu,
Mungkin bibit-bibit cinta mula terbit.
Tahun itu juga,
Makin bertambah anak-anak buahku.

Tahun itu,
Tahun 2012.
Tahun aku mendapat ijazah.
Tahun aku memulakan alam baru.

Tahun seterusnya?
Nanti-nanti lah aku fikirkan.

.ditulis dengan perasaan yang senget.

.i'm 22.

2011-03-24T08:12:00.004Z

Yeay. I am officially a busy person. Ha ha wth? Well had my birthday on March 22nd. Well since it was on Tuesday, I had to go for weekly design meeting which ends at 4 p.m. Not so cool ay? Right. I went home and chill. Not chill, I actually had to do works, plenty of them.

Around 6 ish, my friends called for a birthday dinner. Just 3 minutes walk from my place. It's an Italian restaurant called Piccolos. I supposed the chef was crying in the kitchen by looking at how we had the food. We, Malaysians, we want more sauce because the taste was too plain. Also, we shared our food. :)

After my birthday dinner, we all went to Octagon centre and watched some dance training for International Cultural Event. Sat there for awhile and felt lonely. Of course, this is Dira talking. I always feel lonely at times like these. Birthday! I usually cut birthday cake with my family. So right after the dance training, I went home. And sleep. Grin. Not so much on my birthday eh?

Wait, haven't done yet. I went to Meadowhall yesterday. Went shopping. Shoes and hoodies. I just wanted to spend money and buy something for myself too. And today, I am so tired that I woke up at 6.30 a.m. Now, I think I'm gonna take shower and get ready for 11 o'clock class. Smirk.

And thank you for all of the birthday wishes. Love.

.mind my writing.

.redundant.

2011-03-15T01:49:00.001Z

Ops. Submission is on Friday. Have I started anything yet? Oh yes I did. Everything is in progress and the fact that I work in the Information Commons, that is something really new to me. I like it.

But really need to go shopping, brain is fried from every aspect. Need to vent.

.jealousy.

2011-03-10T16:56:00.004Z

Something just happened. And all I could think of is jealousy and the fact that people don't like to see others happy. They'd rather have their heart torn than share the happiness.

I’m having one of the best moments in life. I know there are many past moments as memorable, but this one, I would say I kinda waiting for it. Long.

Despite all the work loads, I’m able to put myself outside my comfort zone with the sweetest smile. That sounds corny. These works, I’m not bothered, not at all. I know what I want to do. I have my schedule and I know I start late, but still, in track.

Yes, I’ve drifted a bit from the root story. Anyway, yeah I don’t understand why people would come up with tremendous ideas to pull me or someone down. Should use the ideas for better things, right?

You know, I don’t care what you want to say about me, but spend some time to take a look at yourself in the mirror, and have a thought about what you said about me.

.march.

2011-03-05T14:21:00.000Z

I have a good start in March. I really do. Hopefully this will last long. Cheers!

.home.

2011-02-27T19:56:00.002Z

The place I called home. Yeah it’s my home sweet home. My home, that is not comparable. Full of love. Full of loving people too. I’ve stayed in Shah Alam since I was 10 years old. So, I went to the primary and secondary schools nearby my house. Stayed at that house for at least 11 years. Just last year we moved to a new house.

Well, here in Sheffield too. I have a home with a bunch of people who makes me laugh and cry together. They are absolutely amazing people.

You know, I have come to realize that there is another home that always welcomes me with warmth. And smile. Weird? No. It’s just that I always feel this when I step into the house. (you have 3 in total now? grin.)

It’s true that we have not been seeing for some times. But whenever, WHENEVER I go over, always the same treatment. When I was little until now, a grown up. How nice to be treated that way. Which home I’m talking about? Heh I shall keep that to myself. Just want to surprise myself for what will happen in five years time. Will it be the same as it is now? Hopefully.

.written under the influence of heart and mind.

2011-02-22T22:33:00.002Z

Finally had my wrap for dinner. Thanks to Zatesa. You are amazing. :)

Well, I am just writing this just to kill time. I have class at ten tomorrow and that is the only class on Wednesday. Planning something, maybe shopping or movie, and of course I thought of going for netball training in the afternoon but that depends on my hands’ condition. Bengkak dengan rate yang pantas. Can’t bend my wrist properly so maybe giving them a rest until Thursday.

So, you have anything in mind what I could do tomorrow? I was thinking to catch up with my previous lectures, but I think that would be a little too ‘heavy’. Heh.

Also, I’m wondering if you talked too much about your feelings, will it go away some time later.

Ah. This heart loves to come up with stuffs. Let mind do the writing.

Oh finally found a house for seven people. It looks more like a bank though. Ha ha. Ground floor has 3 en-suite bedrooms and first floor with 4 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms. But! They are not connected. And it takes 15 minutes to go to class unless take the tram that would be less than 5 minutes of course! Still, haven’t decided yet. Maybe will confirm with the owner at the end of this week.

Hmm ok lah. I want to do something else. I have got nothing to write.

Actually, I’ve got my results, and Alhamdulillah the results were okay. :) see, I just don’t want to write about this because my tutor said so many things like:
You should give a pat on your back
You did good
Congratulate yourself!
You know, next year you will have to work harder. <-- not expecting this though..

Hahah Mike Rennison, he’s a very cool tutor. Thanks Mike!

.james blunt.

2011-02-21T16:16:00.001Z

Yes, I went to his live performance in Sheffield last Saturday. He was brilliant!! Love love love!

.what-so-ever.

2011-02-17T14:46:00.000Z

Weird. They are all adults. Acting like none. Selfish.

.the six colleagues.

2011-02-13T23:12:00.002Z

I had a, very long weekend. Well, I attended Seminars Inducting New Executive-committee (SINE) training in Manchester for 3 days and 2 nights. It was a preparation to setting up Robogals in UK region and it was really, an awesome experience. My team members are amazing. We didn’t know each other until we met at Manchester Piccadilly Station and walked together to the training location. In fact, we got to stay together in Hatters Hostel, a decent hostel I would say. Good way to make acquaintances ay?

We went out as colleagues on the second night since we didn’t get a break at all. Plus, we slept very early on our first night there. Took about 20 minutes walking to a pub called Thirsty Scholar where we went before dinner because we had our reservation at Nando’s quite late. Yeah. We had a good chat and get along very quickly. I have been a very observant and attentive amongst the members. Funny they said I’m a sweet girl that could not name one bad person on earth.

Oh, we took taxi back to hostel because everybody was worn out. Not just that, we were wearing thin clothes and weather was too cold to walk back.
Funny thing was on the third day of training, we were thrilled to go back to Sheffield. After the group photo, we walked as fast as we could just to catch the next train to Sheffield. Ha ha and I could never imagined that I have missed Sheffield so much!

I am so tired right now. Good thing I only have one class that starts at noon tomorrow. Still, need to get some rest now. Good night all!

.make your life miserable.

2011-02-04T17:13:00.003Z

Okay. Let me list down my modules for autumn semester.

1. Group design project
2. Experiment and modelling
3. Flow and Power
4. Sensors, actuators and controllers
5. The integrity of materials and components
6. Engineering management

So, what’s the fuss of listing them all? I only have four written exams (100% on exams) which are from 3 to 6. The first two are 100% coursework. Right. Straight to the point shall we. I think I couldn’t think straight just because 4 and 5. These papers, they were my nightmares. Sigh. I’m terribly sorry for myself for taking up these two modules.

See, I have not done feeling sorry for myself yet to found out my new modules for the spring term. This term, three of them are electives. So those are the bold ones.

1. Group design project
2. Mechatronics
3. Advanced fluid mechanics
4. Energy - Properties and optimisation
5. Renewable energy

Let's hope my new resolution (refer .rawr.) is not going to waste.

.rawr.

2011-02-02T18:18:00.002Z

Hey! This could be the worse exam period. Or maybe not. Last semester was terrible. Ah I still have two papers to go. So I came up with new resolution.

New resolution? To be more consistent. On whatever. Heh. Listing it all here would embarrass me as some of them would definitely be ancient history as early as, right now. So let’s keep it to myself (so I could adjust here and there without your knowing).

Well, good news. I’m the Schools and Students Manager of Robogals (google it, I have no time explaining since its exam week). Pioneer in Sheffield. It just happened, when I had to study.

1. Checking emails on regular basis, and Robogals caught my attention.
2. Completed the application form for executive committee member.
3. Received an email saying 'INTERVIEW BY PHONE' on Saturday. But none.
4. Just yesterday night, while watching Korean dramas, received a call from Australia. Oh. It’s the interview. Last for ten minutes.
5. Application results came out late afternoon today.
6. And hey, you are accepted!

For a second, I thought, it’s my past time to complete all forms. But this one, somehow, cheered me up today. Ha ha ha so happy that I am too tired to study. Can we skip the exams for now? My mind is so tired. dakf;dljnsribgik oh sorry. Head is too heavy that it fell on the keyboard. Ahh I should stop writing now. Talk to you soon!

.rindu.

2011-01-30T16:29:00.001Z

Tak ada ribut,
Tak ada petir,
Berkatalah si hati.

Jangan dibiarkan hati berkarat,
Selagi berkeringat,
Cari lah jalan taubat.

Mudah kau kata,
Pernah kau cuba?
Kalau tak cuba,
Bergelimanglah dengan dosa.

Sayu hati dengar Azan,
Tenang hati dengar bacaan Quran,
Sebak dada mengenangkan kasih Tuhan.

Terima kasih Ya Tuhan,
Sesungguhnya hati ini masih mendapat nikmat Mu.

.Nadia Azmi.

2011-01-30T00:22:00.003Z

Happy birthday Yaya!!

May your happiness grow and stay amazing!

Love, Rara

.Alhamdulillah. Thank you God.

2011-01-27T00:27:00.001Z

Dear God, please bless me with your mercy and please bestow me strength.

Ameen.

.coffee obsession.

2011-01-23T20:00:00.003Z

"No one can understand the truth until he drinks of coffee's frothy goodness." Sheik Abd-al-Kadir

It has been quite awhile since I had my coffee. Not the 3in1 kind of coffee. Somehow it is true, caffeine helps me go through the stresses better. I have no choice but I will continue taking it like how I did before.

I am not addicted to it, but I am officially obsessed with it. The smell. The taste. it takes you where ever you want to go. I know I’ve been taking coffee way too much. But hey, if it were not for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality. Grin.

Anything, name anything. Stress over exams, need to vent, hang out with friends, talk over something serious. The solution? Coffee.

.yawn.

2011-01-22T15:57:00.002Z

Nice feelings grow when you are told you are a star, wise, amazing, and other good personalities. It feels somehow your hard works are now paid off.

Now, thinking a lot whether to go home or not for summer break.

If I were to stay, without getting any internship, that would waste money, time, and the fun parts back home. But, if I were to get internship, I’d stay, InsyaAllah. So, what I am planning is simple. Go home if I could not get a job here and look for internship in Malaysia.

Speaking of going back Malaysia, I will get to see my beloved family, friends, food, and time will definitely be filled with special things. Plus, I have already got offered for a part-time job, photo shoot for a bridal shop. Grin. As for internship, hopefully will be sorted out soon.

Right, back to reality. I have stopped studying since Tuesday. Though I tried so hard to study, but I just could not. This is the time that I feel homesick. So badly. Not the right time too. Guess I just need to be a little stronger than what I’ve used to be.

I’ve been writing quite frequent. Most of them, my feelings and experiences. What else should I write about? I am not good at reviewing others work, so do criticising. But that sounds fun. Isn’t it? Shall try one day. After the exams end most likely.

Okay, going to start a productive evening by reading notes. You wish. Smirk.

.post is titled yawn because I've yawned too much while writing this.

.selfish.

2011-01-19T17:45:00.004Z

I am selfish and I admit that.

Well, it started when Melek came over for lunch. I cooked tom yam and omelette for her. Bet something is wrong with the taste bud as she said food was lovely. And, she brought apple pie with custard for dessert, yummy but a little too tangy for me.

Had some chat and they’re private and confidential stuffs. Doesn’t mean they’re P&C, your adrenalin is rushing thinking it could be you we are talking about. Ha ha. Must say we both were screwed with our poor vocabulary’s day.

Family, friends, lovers, food, mandarin, China, South East Asia and also, Family Guy. From all that issues, we ended up admitting we both are selfish people. Ha ha ha. I just loved it when two people are talking bad about each other. We talked about these stuffs while having our “hot tea” which was teh tarik. She had two mugs and I had one. She went all dizzy and hyper.

See, didn’t get to spend the whole day as she has to go back to Rotherham. So I sent her to the bus station, accurately, I need to pick up my package from the post office i.e next to the bus station (I'm not a painstaking to walk back and forth).

Well, another goodbye. Why, why, whyyyy?? Sigh. I just don’t like goodbyes. Not being dramatic but that is something that I hate the most. Unless, if it is a closure then goodbye is fine. If you know what I meant.

And walked back to the apartment in less than 15 minutes. Rushed home to skype with Ibu, but too late. She was already in bed. Cleaned the dishes and now, writing on today’s activities and finishing it in a minute. So back to work now. Wait, what work? Today is my rest day. So, will write again soon!

.purpose of the story is actually to state that I’m selfish.

.exam fever.

2011-01-17T00:44:00.002Z

Right. First paper, Tuesday, January 18th. It’s my favourite module, Flow and Power. I’m a bit stressed out here. Not because of the paper, but the exams’ timetable. Why must this module be the first? I could have done more revision with other modules if this one is the last or maybe in the middle of exams. I have been doing too much revision on this one that I have forgotten about the rest. And now, take that! Just sorted out notes for other modules and they are piling up on my dining table. I just don’t know where to start.

Interesting fact, after Flow and Power, I have two weeks gap before the next exams. And they are in the final week of exam. Three papers in a week. Of course, I love the fact that last paper is on February 5th, and new term starts on February 7th. Nice? I know.

Should have started revision earlier. Heh. Same regrets, and same old Dira.

.this is heart talking.

2011-01-15T17:28:00.002Z

How much you miss home? Tonnes.Heart is breaking for not being close to home. As matter of fact, this is the path I have chosen. So be strong and survive!

Why chose this path? I guess it’s time I run far, far away, find comfort in pain.

How long more do you want to stay away? No, let me rephrase. How long more do you think you can be away from home? Yes you keep yourself busy, you travel and extending years in foreign country. I will wait a little longer for a clearer vision. Cos I’m not rushing.

You know you’ll miss home a lot, why torture yourself? There are things need to be left home, unsettled. And, I’m just not ready for everything. I’m not tortured, but most likely, the loved ones are tortured for I’m not home.

.listening to Tears and Rain by James Blunt.

.dream big.

2011-01-11T21:04:00.003Z

I have dreams. Dreams that need a whole load of hard works. I keep this to myself and only those special people are told. You probably annoyed since I’m not telling, why do I blog about it? Because, it’s my blog.

One of my dream.
Talking about dream, I dreamt of something last night. I was crying in my dream as well as in my sleep. What’s the difference? Figure that out. It was a sweet dream and I was crying of happiness. He he he imagine how I’d look like, crying with joy. But woke up with slight fever. Doesn't really matter as I was happy in my sleep. Isn't it easy to make someone happy? Even it was a dream. So, pray your way for happiness too!

.bahasa.

2011-01-08T21:59:00.001Z

Tibe-tibe rase nak tulis entry kali ni dalam Bahasa Melayu. Asal? Saye pun tak tau. Mungkin dah tibe masa memartabatkan Bahasa Melayu kot. Walaupun bahasa rojak, tapi sekurang-kurangnya saye masih boleh berbahasa dengan baik. Asal korang paham sudah lah kan. Asek nak guna English je, boring lah. Nama pun England, mother tongue pun English. Macam kat Malaysia gak kan, dok Malaysia nak cakap English. Dok England nak cakap Melayu. Hihihi rasa lucu pulak tulis dalam bahasa. Bukan ape, cume tak berapa biasa. Kalau bercakap tu standard lah, tapi bile menulis, tak guna spelling yang betul rasa bersalah kat org yg tungkus lumus buat ejaan supaya nampak intelektual. Okay lah, tulisan ni sekadar selingan daripada belajar yg memenatkan tapi memandaikan. Selamat malam!

.Next post is not guaranteed to be written in English/Malay.

.drawing.

2011-01-07T03:03:00.004Z

You must be lying if you said you've never drawn this.

I'm missing childhood life, the only time I could make mistakes without giving harm to anyone.

.'kampung saya' means my village.

.atikah jamaludin.

2011-01-06T01:30:00.004Z

Happy Birthday Atikah Jamaludin!

Have a rock n roll birthday!

.beautiful song.

2011-01-04T23:40:00.005Z

I love James Blunt live performances, where I got to watch raw emotions. Love it so much that I've been listening to him a lot. And at least, will listen to his songs before sleep. Weird, but he has this voice that no one could have, at the present.

One of my favourite. Enjoy!

.of course if you like someone you'll give them credits.

.friends grow apart.

2011-01-03T16:30:00.002Z

Something I forget, I was a good friend.

As you grow older, interests change, personality matures, and it is just natural to make new friends. And to realize that most of my friends, we have different views, opinions, different taste in fashion, music and etc.

These friends, they are not just good friends because of what we like, but we like each other company and companionship. They are awesome people. They listen, generous, respectful and of course, they don’t put me down.

That’s what friends are made for, in my opinion. If you grow apart with your friends, because of stupid things, remember the thick and thin you’ve been through together. Don't be embarrassed to apologise, and even sometimes it wasn't you to be blamed at. It isn’t fair to give up friendships that you’ve built for years.

.OCD to care-free.

2011-01-02T23:50:00.003Z

Last time, I was a perfectionist. Now, is at ease.
Last time, I observed too much. Now, I only analyse the important things.
Last time, I enjoyed cleaning the house. Now, not anymore.
Last time, I was automysophobia. Now, it gets better.
Last time, I hate if bed is unmade. Now, it looks better unmade.
Last time, I emptied sink at all time. Now, at least a spoon is left unwashed.
Last time, I showered twice a day. Now, I shower if I had to.
Last time, I hung clothes with hangers. Now, not hang and everywhere.
Last time, I tied cables together. Now, I could be strangled by them.
Last time, I don’t like writing. Now, I am starting to enjoy it.
Last time, I felt awkward to write about myself. Now, I couldn’t care less.
Last time, I cared about what people say. Now, it’s none of my business.

.500 days of summer.

2011-01-02T17:27:00.000Z

People change. Feelings change.
It doesn't mean that the love once shared wasn't true and real.
It simply just means that sometimes when people grow, they grow apart.

.happy new year.

2011-01-01T22:29:00.003Z

Happy new year guys! Have a fruitful year ahead.

.photo taken on London Bridge with six others, which obviously did't fit in the photo.

.getaway.

2010-12-27T20:29:00.012Z

Oh hey readers! I just got back from Portugal and having cough, sore throat and etc. Still, I’m leaving Sheffield for another week to Bristol and London. O yeah, celebrating New Year in London.

In-flight madness, we had to stay in the plane for five hours because of the snow. Although we have got to fly, we reached Faro airport at 0330 hours. But!!!! Weather was really nice. We were all excited for it was windy and warm.

Anyway, covered four cities in Portugal. Faro, Lisbon, Sintra and Albufeira. Different cities with different features.

.Faro airport at 0330hours.

.Lisbon at night, view from the top of Elevador De Carmo.

.Moor Castle, the breathtaking view in Sintra.

.Albufeira, got to eat delicious pastries and waffles.

.ho hey! group photo in Faro apartment before we fly back to England.

Well, more photos are on facebook. Sure, if you are a friend of mine, you'll get to see them. Cheers!

.it's time.

2010-12-18T04:25:00.003Z

It's christmas people! Have a good holiday!

much love,
dira

.photo taken at Sheffield's Christmas Market on Dec 17th, 2010.

.which one is you.

2010-12-15T22:34:00.004Z

What has been kept that makes you a bad or good person?

You are good if you:

*thought that I’m pretty/nice/kind-hearted/etc.
*compliment me.
*say welcome when I’m being thankful for the compliment.

You are bad if you:

*thought that I’m pretty/nice/kind-hearted/etc.
*think complimenting would make me brag.
*instead of saying the good things, you criticised.

So, good person always sincere with their feelings yet a bad person, no, it’s not bad. It is just jealousy. Get control of the feelings, and someday, you’ll know what this post means.

'I', could refer to anyone.

.being thoughtful, again.

2010-12-09T19:59:00.004Z

This week is treating me, well. I’ve been busy with uni’s stuffs but still have times to hang out with friends. I am so blessed to have them as my friends.

Knowing you are all alone here, these friends, they really understand. As matter of fact, we are alone here and these friendships make us grow stronger. Not saying that I’ve forgotten friends back home, but we are experiencing different states. Different friends understand different things too. Isn’t it?

And I am enjoying my semester now compared to the two previous semesters. Maybe I am better at handling stresses. Hope it is. I am starting to enjoy time in Information Commons (IC) and staying late at the computer lab with friends, do works together, talk rubbish too. I don’t mind going out in the cold weather to have dinner with these people, and wait, it’s nasi lemak we are talking about. Who could resist when it’s England? Band hero too, just awesome. You know you don’t really sing, but you still want to sing when you are with them. Still, I still couldn’t let my real voice to come out properly, hah.

Although this is the end of semester before we start our exams, with all of the stresses, I am beginning to realize how doing well in university means. Academically, of course. That’s the reason I’m here. Life in university. How could I forget about it? Full of surprises.

What it means to a third year student? It’s not too late for me to realize though university life is coming to an end in blink of an eye. I am going to make the most of these two final years to enjoy life in university and then, to a path I could never turn back, work. Ahhhh spoiler!

Currently craving for wrapz. Gonna ask Zatesa to make one for me. :)

.knock knock.

2010-12-06T00:33:00.006Z

Finally, I have gotten my new laptop. Ahoy! It’s red and it’s dashing. This has kept me waiting for almost two weeks. So, writing this using my current laptop.

YOU have served me for four years now.
YOU were there for me.
YOU knew exactly what I really want to write.
YOU kept the secrets.

For all I know, you’ve been a good companion.

.what you are made of.

2010-12-04T17:24:00.000Z

Life is meaningless without aims.
Aims are not possible without plans.
Plans are created with passion.
Passion relies on one self.

And that one self, must know own capabilities and weaknesses.
You’ll get to know your strength.
Ultimately that strength makes you a winning person.

.sorry.

2010-12-02T17:46:00.003Z

I'm sorry for all the times that I hurt you,
Cause everything inside it never comes out right.

.cold.

2010-12-01T17:32:00.003Z

How my heart looks like?

Exactly.

.photo taken on Dec 1st, 2010 near Weston Park, Sheffield, GB.

.it’s white, once again.

2010-11-27T04:46:00.001Z

It is here again,
Long since I’ve been waiting.

Let the snow wrap the feeling,
Because it is just soothing.

Just when it is melting,
Wish that feeling is not abiding.

.salvation.

2010-11-26T19:52:00.002Z

Have you ever felt indescribable of own feelings?
Because I do.
As I thought things going to be alright,
In fact it should be,
Still I don’t think it is.
Not just yet.
Is it me being selfish?
Because the pride has been wounded.

Listening to Switchfoot "I dare you to move".

.goodbye.

2010-11-26T14:23:00.009Z

Everybody probably knew Ibu was in Sheffield for about a month and a half. Now, she is back in Malaysia safely.

Just a day before Ibu went back to Malaysia
Thanks to my friends (Zatesa, Eziana, Hanira, Naem, Harris, Anoz) here, I think Ibu had fun here. Ice-skating, Nando’s after ice-skating, walking through the rain after dinner in Fulwood Inn, celebrating malam raya at Zatesa’s place, drove down to Bath and even we all went to Nottingham games.

Thanks for the generous friendship.
It‘s true saying goodbye is hard, especially to someone that you love so much. Not just someone, the place you’ve been staying, the people and the weather.

We avoid goodbyes. We avoid that situation at all costs. Eventually, it happens and we are not prepared. Then came tears and anger.

.the sound of silence.

2010-11-25T01:47:00.002Z

Darkness crawled,
As I was falling asleep,
In the silent and strange night.

Awakened by the vivid glare,
Frightened,
That I was alone, again.

.a shoulder pad.

2010-11-24T13:24:00.005Z

We have our shoulders to pat on,
Say it good news,
Or the bad news.

Maybe,
You had your shoulder pad on,
When I was leaning.

Just because,
One day,
When you want to say goodbye,
You will leave,
Without doubt that you have never missed me.

.partner and soul mate.

2010-11-23T14:24:00.005Z

If partner and soul mate is a two different person,
How would you love?

Boys Over Flower

.happiness is real.

2010-11-23T01:04:00.000Z

Be happy

For life is short,
For heart needs a break,
For heart wants to sing along with the walking,
For an expression to be remembered,
For sorrow to be forgotten,
For loneliness to be filled,
For someone has been longing for it,
For joy is in front of you,
For it costs nothing but sincerity.

Dira

.white lies.

2010-11-17T17:50:00.003Z

My attendance for the past few weeks is excellent. Thanks to Ibu for waking me up every single day even when I’m not feeling like going to class. There was one day, I was too lazy, and I am all ready for class. On my way to the lecture theatre, “Zat, are you home? I’m lazy to go to class,” text that I sent to Zatesa. Well, I was too tired, and fell asleep at her place. So I guess Ibu will know I’ve cut classes on that day (Sorry! I lied).

Apparently, there were two classes because last lecture was cancelled due to a sick lecturer. Management class really, I could not pay attention to it. Plus, it’s a two hour class. Not planning to talk about the classes, just saying that I’ve skipped classes on that day. And, it is actually about Ibu going back to Malaysia this weekend. Sigh.

Here comes discipline, house chores and boredom. Again.

.here, again.

2010-10-04T22:14:00.004+01:00

Hello world!

I am finally back in Sheffield. For my third year of studies. So I've missed most of my first week classes, but managed to catch up.

Anyway, I came back with Ibu and Abah. We went up to Edinburgh during the weekend by train. It was a very long journey although it was three hours long. Surprised? That was caused by few non considerate neighbours who talk but doesn't know when to stop.

Edinburgh Castle

We went to country side, and ended up at the Safari and Adventure Park. Amazing thing is, we drove in the animal reserves habitat. And this is life threatening.

Taraaaaaaaa!

We actually covered number of places in a day. We stopped by at Linlithgow Palace and the Deep Sea World (Seafari). Well, it was a short but lovely visit there. Would want to go again for skiing. Plus, Starbucks' mug, missed again!

.the fact that people write about me.

2010-09-23T05:37:00.000+01:00

You know when you are at your best. So do I. I have got to write about what I really think right now as some just don’t realize writing a blog for personal grudge is so lame.

Of course, some will be surprised if it is open to public. Some say share the link in Facebook.

IF, I were the person talked about in a blog, I would want to do so. But, I have moral that I shouldn’t be embarrassing people in that kind of way. Plus, I respect others’ lifestyles. So, for those who are writing about others, write nicely. It’s not that I am insecure of my status, but may affect your status with the One. Say it to my face if you are not satisfied. No?

Cheers!

.raya '10.

2010-09-11T17:37:00.007+01:00

Oh raya! I’m glad to be here, in Malaysia. In fact, very grateful cause I’ve got to spend the celebration with my families and beloveds. I had my first day of Eid in Schiphol Airport, to Manchester Airport and to Sheffield, last year. So, sounds very promising right this year?

Geared up, Abah, Ibu and I went to Penang before we head back to Sg. Petani which is my kampong. Penang was thrilling cause have not been there for quite awhile. Though time spent in Penang was too short. On the way back to Sg. Petani we stopped at the bazaar where people sold hari raya clothes, mercun, food and etc. It was okay. No, it was not so okay. Too crowded, I think.

Eh. Nadia? Abang, Sheda and Dhia? Oh they came back on the next day because Nadia had to go to work. Talking about Nadia, she’s getting married in five days! God, time flies too fast. We do things together, whatever that came across our minds. Jamming the nation, complaining about everything, shopping when we get upset. Oh dear, I am happy for her but I am also going to miss her very much.

So, here I welcome my new family member, Akmal Hazwan. Take good care of my sister or else.... ;)

oh yes! To Dhia Sabrina, my niece that was born on May 22nd, 2010. My little sweetie cherry pie.

Okay, back at raya story. 1st day of raya, we went to relatives houses in Sg. Petani and Kepala Batas. Had limited time for each houses as the time keeper (abah) says half an hour per house. With very sweaty bodies and tired minds, we drove down to Ipoh. Celebrated with Ibu's family and took few photographs with the relatives. And after jamak our Isya'and Maghrib prayers, we headed back to Shah Alam, but, to Aunty Harison's house. Poor thing she has to stay at home as she is on call duty. Craving for rice cause had too much of ketupat, rendang and lemang along the way to Shah Alam. Before 12 midnight, all of us arrived home safely and had a very long rest until the next morning. No, afternoon. Correction, that's just me. He he he...

Till I write again, cheers!

.excuses.

2010-07-20T05:47:00.005+01:00

you are a friend when:

1. not being jealous of your friend's success

2. always be by friend's side through thick and thin

3. don't take friend for granted

4. compete in a healthy manner and don't try to pull friend's down

....

5. d'oh! Just be a good friend dope!

.finally.

2010-07-06T16:56:00.014+01:00

Easter Holiday started with a three days trip to London and the rest were in Paris and Holland. Just a quick review here with some photos.
See, we went to Eiffel Tower on our first night in Paris. Oh god, it was cold. Very cold indeed. But, hey! It's a pretty awesome view here.

And I wasn't sure where had my senses go cos I actually climbed this Eiffel to 2nd Tier. Senses were put aside, and I could breathe the clean air of Paris [eh?]. Well, I was short of breathe. *winks*

On weekends, took a short day trip to Magny-Le-Hongre by the RATP from central Paris. What's that Magny thing? That's where Disneyland Paris is. And they have awesome rides! *thinking* It was raining all day. So I enjoyed the rides, rides, and... oh! Animagique [Google it! Bahhhh].

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Recognize something? Yes that was taken in Keukenhof, Holland. It was during the early spring. Stayed at Eden Amsterdam Hotel which was in the central. Walking distance to the Red Light District, the university, and few steps to the tram station. Eveything went the way they should and I would love to go to Amsterdam, again.

.quick updates.

2010-04-21T22:20:00.001+01:00

Whew... aren’t today and the last date I have updated my blog like, gap with overwhelmed S’s? Well just a quick update what is happening before I write about what happened during Easter.

1. I had the worst sleeping pattern ever. This is all caused by a module that needs to be done in a month but I happily done it within two days time.

2. I overslept OVER a panadol. Who doesn’t? But it shouldn’t be happening to me since I took pain killers few years back. New formulae eh?

3. Class cutting! This must be over, now! Really, now. Not next week or the week after! Exam is coming very soon. Submissions datelines are soon enough to give me sleeping pattern that I probably recovering it from the recent submission. Catch up with whatever that is important, will improve [nodding].

4. And yes, prayer time, Isya’ at 2230hours? MasyaAllah.

5. Interesting thing, apart from the tiring week, I will be hiring a car to head to Manchester, Torbay and Bicester Village. The original plan was to go to Manchester only, but since the car hiring is cheap [expenses will be cheap too, cause there will be Zatesa, Naem and Iwan], so decided to go around. Torbay is just a random picked place to go and Bicester is to shop. You know what I mean.. Photos will probably be disappointing since the LCD camera’s is cracked. Will see what the pro can do. ;)

Well I think that’s about it. I will definitely post some photos taken over the Easter break, soon.

.it's spring time.

2010-02-08T16:32:00.002Z

Here goes the new timetable.

.one moment.

2010-02-02T14:47:00.003Z

I have finally done with my autumn semester. Let’s pray hard for good results, though I sometimes realize that I have always revised for the very last minute. Well been in school, college, and now university, I bring that habit along. How can I leave it back in Malaysia? Grin.

So, spring semester commences in few days time. 8th February, to be exact. My timetable? Hang on there, will be uploaded, soon. Cheers!

.double occasion.

2010-01-29T12:56:00.006Z

It's been awhile since I last blogged. Well, been busy with studies and also some other stuffs. Plus, I still have another one exam to go, then spring semester commences the next few days. So, blogging today (30/01/2010 Malaysia time) just to wish my dearest sister, Nadia, happy birthday, and I love you loads!

AND

To Nadia Azmi and Akmal Hazwan

Congratulations on your engagement.

<3, Dira.

.3rd runner up.

2009-11-01T14:19:00.005Z

Remember the netball match I’ve mentioned earlier? It was awesome! Everyone played so well. Congratulations to all! Other than that, we were happy taking photos of course!

I've got myself sandwiched between the opponents. Graceful game? Very. Hardly bend my right knee now. Sigh.

But! Had my nasi lemak, rendang ayam, ayam masak merah and tepung pelita. Grin. And.. and... I’m very excited to get myself a blender so I can start cooking other dishes. (p/s: I'll come back with a double degree - culinary arts and mechanical engineering ;> )

.the bit.

2009-10-29T19:28:00.001Z

You know what is terrible? Having too much of food consumption. Aahhh it’s like stuffing food in your mouth when your throat says no and stomach says “will burst in a bit”. That’s not the interesting bit here.

I’m going to Nottingham to participate in the Malaysian Nottingham Games and it is, one of the biggest event held in the UK. Yes, I’ll be playing for the netball team, as the wing defender (sometimes goal defender though I admit I’m no good at it). Photos, of course will be uploaded as soon as I come back. It is just a one day event (i.e on the Oct, 31st). Oh please, remind me of the camera!

Mind me using ‘bit’ too much. :)

.syukri shairi.

2009-10-10T11:00:00.003+01:00

Happy Birthday Syukri Shairi
Thank you for being a great [in some cases annoying] friend. Cheers!

.superior and grieves.

2009-10-02T22:34:00.003+01:00

I’m getting the sensation of cooking. I’ve cooked chicken curry and soup. Yummy! At first trial, chicken curry tasted good. Well both tasted good. Though the potatoes cooked with curry wasn’t done very well like the chicken soup. Weh! Empuk okayh! Smirk. Uh. Enough talking about food. I eat too much here. Probably I’m just getting used to the weather as well as the walking.

I’m missing everyone at home. Sometimes feel awkward when you have to spend time alone when your friends are busy with classes or some other activities that you’re just not interested to join. Still, it appears that my family and my beloveds are always on Skype, Yahoo Messenger and MSN to talk to. Of course, that makes you realize you’re thousands miles away from home.

Classes started, and it’s not as hectic as I thought. But yes, I have to make loads of efforts to study what I’ve been taught in classes when I’m home. Not easy I tell you, because at the very same time when you need to get some food, you cook and clean for yourself. You do the laundry, you do the folding, and you get the back ache as well. And it is just not easy when you have a flatmate (referring to one particular girl) that doesn’t know how to do the cleaning (or just being ~~ignorant?~~unintelligent?). Get the rubbish, and throw it in the bin. Do the cleaning, do the cleaning, get it?

Okay, I should get some sleep for tomorrow’s social day. Planning on going for a social sports organized by the Massoc (i.e Malaysian Singaporean Society). Oh to do laundry too! I will be writing again, soon. Cheers!

.as promised.

2009-10-02T19:13:00.014+01:00

AUTUMN SEMESTER 28/09/09 TO 06/02/10

click the image to view clearly yeap. :)

.plain day.

2009-09-28T17:07:00.008+01:00

This is only my first ~~week~~ day of academic classes. What can I say. My day onwards will be and going to be busy from nine in the morning to one or two in the afternoon. Groan. I’ll post my timetables when I get my labs and tutorials confirmed.

Aaaaaaaahh.. I’ve been having chicken curry for lunch and dinner. Sunday and Monday, to be precise. Yeah. It’s because my cooking tasted good (believe it or not, I’m good at it!), though my potatoes doesn’t cooked well. Getting myself a chicken soup recipe from Ibu and will try to cook on weekend. Apparently, that’s the only day I’m free from the typical hectic engineering student’s life.

Apart from the busy day, I went to Fiona’s room for the first time after she bought some dinner at Subways (so did I). It’s huge. I came across the mirror, notice board and everything reachable in a stretch. Oh yes, “This is for the disable actually, maybe they had no room left when I moved in. You see here, (walked to the wall and showed how she shut her window with the help of a pedal” as I remembered. Grin.

.growling stomach cost you cooking.

2009-09-26T18:49:00.005+01:00

Don’t you think so? I saw tempting packets of Asam Laksa maggi when I was buying groceries to cook chicken curry tomorrow. Well then, since I’m too tired to walk elsewhere to get some food (after walking more than 3 hours at the mall and had handful of shopping bags), I bought 2 packets of maggi. And here’s the photos taken when I was contemplating not to finish it at a go. :) ohh maggi story...

.just before dinner.

2009-09-24T17:40:00.012+01:00

At this hour, everyone at home is getting ready for a visit from Nadia’s future family in law. Well I’ll say I obviously looking forward for this kind of events at home since she’s the only sister I have. So when it comes to a wedding, preparation is going to be very interesting yet exhausting. I have to admit though when Abang’s wedding preparation I wasn’t involved so much. Here I am, not a chance to be there for Nadia’s events. Sigh. Oh wait, I’ll be there for the wedding, of course.

Just so you know, I’m in Sheffield that's midland of England. I catch my breathe every time I reach my department. Climbing up and walking down the hills is normal here. Wait till I come back, I’ll positively look fit!

Well, that’s part of the small town in Sheffield. I have not been to Meadowhall yet. I heard they have one of the biggest shopping complexes in the United Kingdom. Will pay a visit one day, this weekend probably?

She’s a friend of mine here. Fiona, she’s from Torquay that’s South of England. Try this http://www.bbc.co.uk/devon/content/image_galleries/torquay_gallery.shtml?1

Okay, going to have dinner. Subway? Fish and Chips? Cheers!

.troubleshooting.

2009-09-23T18:22:00.005+01:00

Let’s just face it at the very first place. I’m not a good writer. But I love to read others’ blogs and appreciate blogs that are well written. In fact, my best friend convinced me to start blogging for long ago. Here I am, writing my first ever blog. At least it worth that I do blog now.

I say blogging is one for troubleshoot my lonesomeness, for now. One never knows what blogging could do to me. I might get caught enjoying blogging as much as I love reading others’?

with love, Dira.